the parable of the swing

despite having a to-do list that may run the circumference of the earth several times
i heeded Felicity’s repeated plea to go to the park this morning after dropping all the boys off at school
the low lying clouds creating a hush all around the neighborhood
and the emptiness of the park itself
led to a quiet, serene moment just Felicity and i
the feeling of quietude, especially within the walls of my own mind
has been rare these days
i am grateful that i broke myself away from the agenda

Felicity of course headed straight for the swings
the big girl swing
on her tummy she hopped up
she asked me to push her faster
her legs were dragging so i told her to lift her legs higher
upon her obedience, this attempt produced a colossal fall for her three year old body

i reach down to pull up and hold my crying little girl
brushing off the dreaded playground bark
i found myself saying the words that i needed to hear
its ok, you just fell, you can get right back up and try again
here sit on my lap, we can swing together

as i held my bark clad daughter on that swing
my mind raced with the deeper meaning of my words

as i have explained to you through various past posts
i am in the midst of a life transition
accepting of my husband’s disease
continuing to understand and fulfill my role in our family
working to help support us through various avenues such as this and that
i have felt a lot lately that i just keep trying to lift my legs from dragging on the ground to reach new heights
only have to fallen off that swing
some falls i have been able to quickly recover from
but sometimes i just want to sit there amongst that bark and just chuck it around and cry
these colossal falls have required someone else to pick me up and offer to swing with me
i must understand that its ok to fall in my trying
that i just need to keep getting back up
and rely on the Lord more to help me stand up and try again

i have been praying for help from the Lord in acceptance and in opportunities
and now that i have my answers
i need to get to work
i need to not be afraid to fall
i need to stop letting each setback get me down 
but realize that its just a little setback
and i have someone there who will raise me up and swing with me

grateful that even in the everyday bits of life
such as a park trip with my girl
the Spirit can touch my heart to find deeper meaning
and answers to the yearnings of soul

when have you found meaning or answers in something unexpected?