{'cloud light' photo by atelierDU}
The mad morning rush is over and I'm noticeably affected.
As I walk through the door, I quickly turn on my favorite soothing music, the soundtrack to "Pride and Prejudice"
such moving, yet grounded music, even a touch of melancholy to allow for my mood to slowly sink in, permitting time for thoughts to process, then dissipate with the fleeting notes.
Dropping to my knees the tears come.
I, as I'm sure all mothers do at one point in their lives, have a particular child whose well-being produces tears that wet the pillow often. One I pray I have sufficient strength, patience, love, and ability to receive inspiration in order to parent. And not just parent, but help foster those characteristics and God-given abilities that he was born with on the earth to fulfill that mission he was meant to do and become. To help him overcome those weaknesses that will bind him to consequences that I so desperately want him to be able to avoid. Some of those weaknesses that I see in myself, but for some particularly reason have been magnified within him. Oh I pray that my own weaknesses may not stand in the way!
As tender mercies do come to those who diligently seek, I have had several of them in the past while to aid in my anxious desire to know how to help him.
One came in the form of a friend who came forth with some expertise on some of the issues that beset him and gave up her time to help provide me with some vital tools.
Another, a conversation from a concerned teacher who supports him at school in the efforts I am doing at home.
An amazingly attentive husband who fills in tremendously during those moments where I lack the patience and love required.
Another came this morning as I knelt down in prayer, overwhelmed from the confrontational events of this morning. An idea that I can put into action right away, something practical for him and for I. Something to draw both of our thoughts toward the good. I may share it with you once I am done.
I am so grateful for a God, a loving and merciful Heavenly Father, who is ever aware of us and our needs. Who sent his children down to us, and entrusted us with their care and development. Such an immense task left to this imperfect woman. But this woman knows that she has not been left alone in the effort and can draw upon His strength and inspiration hour after hour, minute after minute, as she puts forth her hands to shape lives.
