Tuesday, February 19, 2013

my trail of reminders: awake, for God is a God of miracles

whether it was the looming cloud cover today
or the fact that i sat at the top of the stairs and wept in disbelief as i watched my beloved husband scoot down the stairs one tread at a time 
his legs did not have the strength to step down them
then to stagger as he tried to stand at the bottom
all with determination to make it on his own
...today has been heavy

but there has also been a trail of reminders throughout my day that has culminated into an undeniable divine message for me

as we drove to school under a grey sky this verse of this hymn parted the heavens momentarily to remind me of peace and hope
when dark clouds of trouble hang o’re usand threaten our peace to destroy,there is hope smiling brightly before us,and we know that deliv’rance is nigh.we doubt not the Lord nor his goodness.we’ve proved him in days that are past.
later on i was able to dedicate some time for reflection
and a particular verse spoke out to my heavy spirit
behold he changed their hearts; yea, he awakened them out of a deep sleep, and they awoke unto God.  Behold, they were in the midst of darkness; nevertheless, their souls were illuminated by the light of the everlasting word.
awoke unto God
what a powerful imagery of indescribable brightness
awakening unto him out of the deep sleep of our grief, anger, loneliness, pride
and though we may be in the very midst, heart, core surrounded by our thickest darkness
nevertheless
oh my father’s favorite word
nevertheless
our souls will be illuminated by the light of his promises, his gospel, his love
our hearts will be changed

this is a promise i will cling on to
reach for
embrace

the last breadcrumb of my trail to hope amidst my trouble came in an expected way
my stalwart sister in law Jani that you have all come to know through her strength during the scariest of trials,
one that is difficult to summarize briefly
but one of putting faith in the Lord and doctors that Abigail’s newborn heart could be reconstructed and she could live, grow, develop
Jani asked me to make a copy of the video that i created using those first images of their new little family, 
the air flight helicopter, the waiting, the life saving tube, the moments of first connection between parent and child
a video that only showed the beginnings of her long struggle
she wanted to show this as a testament of overcoming adversity to her young women whom she teaches for our church 
youth who by looking at this energetic little one
may never have guessed the treacherous trials she has passed through


video

as i saw the miracle of abigail unfold before my eyes once again
i wanted to run and hold my vivacious little niece
one who will be undergoing surgery once again in a few short months



she is a living testimony to me that God is a God of miracles 
and that whatever difficulty i am going through, he will lead me through it
I am in his hands
Mike is in his hands
this trail of divine signatures was the perfect reminder today
that i doubt not the Lord nor his goodness
for he has proved it in days that are past
and he will prove it again and again,
each and every day as i awake unto Him
and though i may be surrounded by darkness at times
my soul will be illuminated by that knowledge that i am in His hands
His hands 
a God of endless things but most of all a Father in the truest sense of the title
of all the titles of respect and honor and admiration that are given to Deity,he has asked us to address him as Father


{for the beginning of Abigail's life miracle start here and to read more click here or on the label 'Abigail' in the sidebar
to read more about our journey with Multiple Sclerosis click here }

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