Thursday, May 02, 2013

'about me' by my husband the new co-blogger

i am giddy today
something i have been working on for a long time is taking its first introductory step into the blogosphere with this post and its difficult to contain my excitement
i have a vision for my blog that i have shared with you
and have been overwhelmed by the support you have shown me
but i haven't exactly shared with you my vision of how that is going to happen
it will be revealed piece by piece
my goal is for you to be along for the transformation
not just one day hop on over and see something new and completely unfamiliar
this vision will enfold day by day, month by month
a spark igniting another spark
so that it will seem like a naturally blazed trail

well i won't be doing this journey alone
i never have really
with my family and dear friends behind me and you loyal supporters beside me
but now there will be another voice and point of view to this radical ride that is the life of the Johnson crew
i am honored
and ecstatic
to share that my incredible husband will now be a co-author on 
Sweet Dreams are Made of These
my blog becoming our blog
soon to have a new name and a new look
as i mentioned to you before

Mike will be blogging here more and more regularly
and i know you will just love him
he has guest blogged for me before here and received great response from you all
please leave a comment below today to show him a warm welcome

i have asked him to write an introductory 'about me' post
he really was quite perplexed on why i would want to him write about himself
or what really there was to tell
he thinks of himself as simple
and in some ways he is
but i want you to know more about the ins and outs that make him get up in the morning
make him laugh
and make him cringe

i happily introduce
my man of steel

Hi, my name is Mike.  And this is gonna hurt.

When you cruise by Briana’s blog, you expect to see a certain style - a certain ‘je ne sais quoi’ - that pleases you.  It’s soothing like that blanket you carried around as a child.

Well...I don’t and can’t write like that.  (Ok, I’m actually thinking right now that maybe I should take a crack at it one of these days and hack Briana’s blog and post something in her style and see if I can fool anybody.  I better start studying...)  

I just came upon the first thing ‘About Me’.  I’m like the dogs in the movie “UP”. “Squirrel!”  My line of thinking is constantly zigging and zagging.  The chances of me ‘guest blogging’ for Briana and putting together something linear and coherent are similar to Jim Carrey’s chances with Lauren Holly in the movie Dumb and Dumber

I think I just stumbled upon another ‘About Me’ tidbit.  I love movies...well quotable movies to be more precise.  And they probably need to be movies from the 80s and 90s.  In almost every conversation you have during any given day, you can work in a movie quote seamlessly.  Seriously you should try it.  I have and I was successful.  It used to be a game I played with customers at Barnes & Noble.  Try and weave at least one movie quote into your conversation.  It’s loads of fun and seriously rewarding when someone recognizes the line.  But prepare yourself mentally for the fact that your lines are rarely recognized.  Another fun exercise is to text a movie line to a friend, brother, or whomever and see how long you can carry the dialogue before you forget what comes next.  This is especially fun in group texts.  I am confident in my ability to quote large portions of Fletch, Fletch Lives, Dumb and Dumber, Clue, The Princess Bride, The Three Amigos, The Fugitive, Christmas Vacation, Anchorman, and Jane Eyre (just kidding about the last one!).

Where was I? Oh yes, ‘About Me’.  I have this strange feeling that Briana has somehow created this image of me that is somehow more than I really am while at the same time portraying me as helpless and crippled. Which, when you think about it, is particularly stunning and quite an accomplishment.  Now that’s a talent.

The truth is I’m just a normal, boring guy.  And Briana, if she had to testify under oath, would admit to accusing me of being boring tens of times - if not hundreds!  I’m a homebody who likes to play and watch (emphasis on the watch due to the aforementioned helpless and crippled state my body is in) sports and Wipeout with my children.  I like to curl up with a good book and lose myself in the imaginative worlds of brilliant creation by talented authors.  I like to sit and think about nothing and everything and sometimes even important things.  I like to help people, but it seems I am on the receiving end of help more often than not.  I like to teach, motivate, and inspire people to be their very best self.  I’m a dreamer.  I’m a believer.  I’m an optimist.  I believe laughter is in fact the best medicine.  I like to smile.  And see people smile back.  Eyes light up with a genuine smile, and I yearn to see that in everybody I meet.  I believe in greatness.  I believe you are great.

I don’t need convincing to eat ice cream, al pastor, and oreos.  I don’t like haircuts, dentists, or that goop that forms in the corner your eyes.  I don’t like Manchester United, the Vancouver Canucks, or hooligans.

I struggle with walking, balance, and things that I once took for granted.  I struggle with cynicism and sarcasm.  I struggle with the boundary between confidence and arrogance.  I struggle with the use of the word ‘seen’ when used in place of ‘saw’.  I struggle with the placement of various nuts in main courses, brownies, and ice creams.  

I am unabashed about my love for my wife and children, my God, and my fellowmen.  Similarly, I love hockey, football, soccer.  I love the tv shows: Elementary, Psych, Person of Interest and Suits.  My favorite piece of literature is Les Miserables by Victor Hugo whose tomb I have visited. (And please don’t tell me you have read Les Miserables if you count the abridged version. Stop it.  Invest the time and read the full version.)  I love Hong Kong, its vibrancy and its people.  I also love Paris for its intimacy as a city and its romantic ambience.

I miss Hong Kong, distant friends and family, the candy bar Whatchamacallit, acid-washed jeans, mullets, Dennis Bergkamp, Patrick Roy and Peter Forsberg, Chevy Chase when he was young and funny, my Darth Vader punching bag, running, and my father-in-law.

I don’t miss braces, acid-washed jeans, mullets (I know, I know it’s a love/hate thing),  stinky tofu from the streets of Hong Kong, broken elevators, short shorts, middle school, and mononucleosis.

I hold to a firm set of beliefs and ideals that are inviolate.  One of these rules is to never write about myself for more than 1000 words.  Another of these rules is that I believe Sour Patch Kids should always be ingested while watching a movie (not Peachy-Os, Briana).


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